MAD MAX: FURY ROAD As the best movie reviewer of all time, I need my eyes. Without them I can’t watch movies. That’s why I’m not blind!...

2015 OSCAR PREDICTIONS A lot of people have been calling and emailing me, asking what will happen at tonight's Oscars. As Hollywood...

THE INTERVIEW (2014) I don’t know what is Hollywood’s big problem, but I am furious! I never thought I would say this, but because of t...

As you know I hate socks because the ones I wear usually have holes in them. And I never wash them because I don't know how to operate ...

AIR BUD: GOLDEN RECEIVER (1998) With all apologies to "The Waterboy" and "Rookie of the Year", this is the greatest...

Anyone who doubts that I like the movies needs to watch my newest music video which proves I am still the best movie reviewer in the w...

FLIGHT (2012) This is a great, great movie about Denzel Washington’s life before he became an actor. Obviously, most stupid people thi...

THE HOBBIT (2012) Without Peter Jackson short people would never have jobs. They owe him a debt of gratitude they can never, ever repa...

PROMETHEUS (2012) I seen the first five minutes of this movie and walked out. It is a blatant slap in the face to people like myself who...

DRIVE (2011) As you all know my parents won't let me get my driver's license until I turn 50 because there are so many crazy driv...

BIG MIRACLE (2012) Every once in a while a movie comes along that makes you shake your head and scream, "What on Earth were you thinkin...

JACK AND JILL (2011) I never thought there would be a movie that could top "The Country Bears" , but then "Jack and Jill...

CAST AWAY (2000) Women are always trying to lose weight, especially fat women. Believe me, I know. I’ve been slapped millions of t...

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (2011) What a bunch of lies. I am sick of this! This movie is utter-deceitful and hurtful. I am crying so bad...

FORREST GUMP II This movie hasn’t come out yet so there’s no reason for me to review something that I haven’t seen although I could ...

THE FIGHTER (2010) This movie is so stupid! It’s not about a fighter. It’s about a boxer. Obviously the director and screenwriter an...

THE HANGOVER PART II (2011) If you saw the first Hangover you pretty much know what the message of this one will be – wild animals ...

THOR (2011) This movie is the last thing the construction industry needs which is why every builder and handyman should be protestin...

POWDER (1995) I am leading a boycott of Powder after I learned the filmmakers refused to audition any minorities for the lead role. ...

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO (2009) I am torn right now because I love dragons so much, but I hate tattoos. They are the worst. ...

JUSTIN BIEBER: NEVER SAY NEVER (2011) Up until last year Justin Bieber was just a normal boy with the voice of an angel and a great...

THE KING’S SPEECH (2010) If you live in America you will never ever be able to see this movie thanks to our forefathers and Barack ...

127 HOURS (Part Two) I never review a movie twice, but I am so upset at the director and the cast, especially James Franco. ...

127 HOURS This movie is way shorter than the title suggests.

TRUE GRIT (2010) The only reason I went to see this movie is because I’ve been told countless times I have true grit. For the most p...